Hug Yourself…We All Need Some Self-Love

Editor’s Note: When I picked up Wes and Anna’s article on self-love I knew they were sending it to me personally. Anna has been aware of some upending events in my personal life recently and she sent this unsolicited piece to remind me that sometimes you need to check out of the chaos and just be kind to yourself. Thanks Anna and Wes for knowing how to support a friend. Sending hugs your way.

 

Hug Yourself….We All Need Some Self-Love

Be kind to yourself 

By Anna Hessel with Wes Hessel

 

You Only Have One You

In tumultuous times, self care, self love, and choosing to be comfortable in our own skin are as important as ever.  Here are some ways to stay positive and upbeat in a negative world:

  1. Remember that Joe Biden, not Donald Trump, is President.
  2. Reading relaxes – curl up with a good book, the Good Book perhaps; read a newspaper or magazine, read blogs (especially this one).
  3. Comfort foods are comforting in moderation and fruits and veggies will keep you healthy.
  4. Exercise: it gives you endorphins, and endorphins sure do make you happy.
  5. That glass of wine, margarita, martini, or Kahlua can be a comfort but do not over do.
  6. Prayers and meditation are a healing balm to a weary soul.
  7. Get a manicure, pedicure, facial, massage, or body wrap – think of it as an investment in yourself.
  8. Use a facemask, take a bubble bath, or a hot shower.
  9. Look at art, it is calming and thought provoking – in a gallery or museum can add to the impact.
  10. Cook or bake a new or old favorite recipe, and then actually eat it, or share it with others.

Let It Out

  1. Light some scented candles, just not so many that you burn the place down, because only a fire in a fireplace or grill is comforting. Opt to meet your fire department at their next open house, not before.
  2. Smile – it takes less muscles to grin versus frowning.
  3. Realize it’s okay to not be okay. God gave us emotions for a reason – controlling them is not always for the best.
  4. Embrace the sadness as you work through the pain – God has your back.
  5. Take a dip in a pool – as long as it’s actually open.
  6. Enjoy a sauna or whirlpool – ditto.
  7. Contact a friend; real friends don’t judge – they encourage, commiserate, and help you to see humor, if there is any, in a given situation.
  8. Call clergy or a help line if things get too difficult for you to deal with on your own.
  9. Scream loud, it actually helps – just do it in an appropriate place; in line at the grocery store, the dry cleaners, a church, theater, or at the department of motor vehicles (tempting though it may be) are not on the list of appropriate places.
  10. Listen to music, it soothes the soul and the savage beast – or is that breast?

You’re Worth It

  1. Hear children’s laughter.
  2. Laugh at something funny or silly – laughter really is the best medicine, after all.
  3. Binge watch favorite shows, take in a movie, find new favorite shows, or watch your favorite film (mine is Legally Blonde but there are many more movies that I love). Give me a chick flick anyday.
  4. Take a break from social media drama – yes, this means you, Facebook.
  5. Do an act of kindness for someone, because being nice never goes out of style.
  6. Compliment someone.
  7. Clean out that closet, and donate what you don’t need – one person’s trash is another’s treasure. Let’s not fill up those landfills.
  8. Dance and don’t care who is watching.
  9. Sing your favorite song loud, even if it is off key.
  10. Take a class – it shows you have some.

Try Something

  1. Go for a walk or a drive, nature can comfort even the most frazzled nerves, but always on designated paths or roads, unless you’re the off-road type.
  2. Turn everything off.
  3. Talk to Alexa – her and I have had some wonderful conversations.
  4. Have a date night – if you don’t have a significant other, date yourself.
  5. Pet an animal – ‘fur-babies’ are an uplifting lot.
  6. Play a board game with friends, but don’t argue over what Free Parking is for, or who gets the dog or the top hat.
  7. Get dressed up, wear a silly hat, or some Betsey Johnson boots.
  8. Play in the snow or the sand.
  9. Redecorate – do something different to spice up your decor. I, however, do not recommend painting multiple color stripes on the walls.
  10. Deep clean the whole house – spring cleaning isn’t just for spring.

Get Out And Get Going…

  1. Window shop, and maybe even stop in to buy something special.
  2. Go to the grocery store on free sample day. Costco has samples everyday.
  3. Volunteer – it helps you and someone else.
  4. Watch a Little League baseball, or pee wee football game, go to your local high school musical, or attend a dance or piano recital, just not as one of those parents.
  5. Drink a glass of champagne while wearing your best outfit – celebrate you.
  6. Stomp your feet, it’s fun – just make sure the surface you’re doing it on can withstand it.
  7. Ride a bike, motorcycle, or snowmobile. How about a Qubi?
  8. Go horseback riding.
  9. Do yoga, water aerobics, barre, spin class, Pilates, or another group exercise – twitch those hips (not twerk)
  10. Take a dance class – ballet, ballroom, and belly dancing are always fun and great exercise; work those endorphins as per Elle Woods.

Prescribe Yourself a Chill Pill

  1. Take a deep breath and exhale.
  2. Watch a sunrise or sunset. How about both?
  3. Stretch – physically or emotionally.
  4. Do something out of your comfort zone but keep it within reason. Getting arrested is not what I’m suggesting here; but maybe try a Karaoke night out.
  5. Visit your place of worship, local library, or neighborhood park.
  6. Attend an online or live event, such as a concert, lecture, or play.
  7. Challenge someone to a short race. It doesn’t matter who wins – you’re in the running.
  8. Walk, dance, or sing in the rain – umbrella or rain slicker optional.
  9. Clear out the kitchen cabinets and donate to a food pantry.
  10. Visit an elderly person – it will make their day and they may just share their wisdom with you.

It’s The Little Things

  1. Count your blessings, even when things are rough – sadness and difficult circumstances will not last forever; this too shall pass.
  2. Thank heaven for being alive.
  3. Smell a bouquet of flowers or your favorite fragrance.
  4. Laugh at yourself, that’s okay to do.
  5. Go to a planetarium, zoo, or aquarium – kiss a dolphin.
  6. HUG! If no one else is available, just wrap your arms around yourself and squeeze – you deserve it.
  7. Write a letter, article, or essay.
  8. Paint something but make sure you own what you chose to paint.
  9. A walk around the block can cure the blues, especially with a dog, friend, or significant other. I don’t recommend walking the cat – just give them a pat on the way out the door.
  10. Wash and wax the car – maybe vacuum it, too.

And Now For Something Completely Different…

  1. Watch cats stretch.
  2. Watch puppies or kittens play.
  3. Order take out, wear your jammies, and watch a black and white show or film.
  4. Look at your high school yearbook and smile at your hair style, then recreate that do. Try on your high school cheerleading outfit, letter jacket, bell-bottom jeans, or other apparel of years gone by.  I certainly don’t mean to boast but the earrings I wore to prom I can still fit in.
  5. Prepare something from a basket of strange ingredients and pretend you are a “Chopped” competitor.
  6. Be silly, not stupid.
  7. Stand up to someone that irritates you, but do so with dignity and class.
  8. Get naked but not in public.
  9. Check out some fun vintage things – a trip down memory lane is good for the spirit.
  10. Do your old high school or college cheer, even if the uniform no longer fits (see # 74).

Do For You And Others

  1. Throw your bathroom scale in the dumpster.
  2. Donate clothes or personal care items to a shelter, clothing closet, or pantry.
  3. Adopt a senior pet.
  4. Become a foster family.
  5. Walk barefoot in the grass or on the beach; you’ve never seen a “Do not walk on the sand sign”, right?
  6. See live theater and enjoy the magic from the stage.
  7. Eat the cookie.
  8. Try a new hairstyle, a different shade of lipstick, or tie a pretty scarf around your neck.
  9. Remember we have a female Vice President – be very cautious where you walk, because that ceiling has been shattered, and there’s glass everywhere. I just have to recall Kamala Harris stating, “So help me, God”, on inauguration day when I need a boost of confidence.
  10. Collect items for Ukrainian refugees, donate to the cause, and keep them in your thoughts and prayers.

Just Breathe…

  1. Invite your in-laws to lunch, you’re in a bad mood anyway.
  2. Go out to brunch with your besties, and drink mimosas or morning glows (mimosas made with wine, my signature cocktail)
  3. Visit your local park district or recreation department, and sign up for classes or events.
  4. Go to a farmers market – spend some time browsing and shopping.
  5. Go boutique hopping with a group of friends – it’s much more productive than bar hopping.
  6. Check into a hotel and be a guest.
  7. Jump in the pile of leaves or snow.
  8. Build a snowman or a sandcastle, or make a snow angel.
  9. Play with dolls, balls, or jump ropes – be a kid again.
  10. Hop on one foot – brush yourself off and start all over again when you fall down.
  11. Just breathe and feel the energy of God’s universe.
  12. Put up a Donald Trump dartboard, and get that pitching arm ready…

Trump Continues Contemptuous Behavior

The Contemptuous Donald Is Finally In Contempt…

Trump faces numerous law suits around the country

By Anna Hessel with Wes Hessel

 

Holding The Contemptuous One in Contempt

After years of apparent criminal and questionable civil business activities, Donald Trump is finally being forced to face the music.  He is being held in contempt of court by New York State Justice Arthur Engoron.  I heartily applaud this decision and am planning a “Contempt for Trump” party, complete with champagne, a DJ for dancing, and swag bags, including a mini-Donald Trump collector’s edition dartboard, macaroons, and a bottle of Evian water, for my guests.  It’s about time the orange haired scowling monster is called on the carpet legally.  Per the citation, this civil contempt charge will cost Trump ten thousand dollars per day until such time as he turns over the subpoenaed documents.

So, What Does That Mean, Really?

So, what exactly is “contempt of court”?  We sometimes hear this phrase referenced as just “contempt”.  According to Wikipedia, being in contempt of court means, “the offense of being disobedient to or disrespectful toward a court of law and its officers.”  This can include willful disobedience of a court order, ignoring the court’s decorum or authorization, or failure to preserve a reverent frame of mind.  Investopedia defines, “Contempt of court is a legal violation committed by an individual who disobeys a judge or otherwise disrupts the legal process in the courtroom.”  This describes Donald Trump accurately.

Ignore The Court at Your Peril

Wikipedia also states, “Contempt of court is essentially seen as a form of disturbance that may impede the functioning of the court.  The judge may impose fines and/or jail time upon any person committing contempt of court.  The person is usually let out upon his or her agreement to fulfill the wishes of the court.”  In other words, Mr. Trump, you have never been, nor will you ever be above the law.

Trying To Stave Off the Inevitable Again…

“The Donald” was ordered back in February of this year to turn over documents for scrutiny no later than March 31, 2022.  It is unclear whether the daily fine is retroactive to the end of March deadline or not, but we can hope that it is.  Sources report that Trump’s legal team had agreed to provide the documents but then filed exceptions saying the summons, despite having been approved by the judge, “is grossly overbroad, unintelligible, unduly burdensome, and does not adequately describe which documents and communications are requested or sought with reasonable particularity.”  Letitia James, the New York State Attorney General, sought the fines to force the former president to comply with the NY State subpoena.

More Of the Same Game

Trump and his company, The Trump Organization  is accused, quite bluntly, by the state of NY of tax fraud.  The attorney general’s accusations in the filing are regarding misreporting property values to receive loans with better terms and improved tax positions.  New York’s top lawyer had also said of late her investigators had, “uncovered substantial evidence establishing numerous misrepresentations in Mr. Trump’s financial statements provided to banks, insurers, and the Internal Revenue Service.”

What, Me Cooperate?

Needless to say, “The Donald”, who apparently feels he is above the law, is still not cooperating.  Ms. James considers Justice Engoron’s actions to be “a major victory” and that the rule of law has prevailed.  These documents are needed for an attorney general investigation into Trump’s business holdings.  Her office has been assisting the Manhattan District Attorney’s office with a synchronous criminal investigation into Donald’s companies, as well.  The court, declaring him in contempt is monumental.  Mr. Trump apparently committed crimes, and this decision should hopefully knock his attitude down a few pegs, but I doubt it will.

More Ways to Try to Hold Off the Inescapable

Criminal charges against his “Organization” are being pursued, and it’s CFO Allen Weisselberg who denies wrongdoing and has entered a not guilty plea despite charges of falsification of business records and tax fraud.  The subpoena in the civil probe by New York’s lead litigator is similar, perhaps say, to the turning over of one’s tax returns when running for president.  Forty-five sued Attorney General James, filing in federal court, at the end of 2021, claiming her exploration to have political motivation.  The suit is still unresolved.  Gee, could this be a stall tactic on the part of “The Donald”?  He would never do such a thing, not.  Trump attorney Alina Habba claims he is unable to turn over the documentation, claiming that he does not actually have said documents.  She goes on to say the office of the attorney general was told this.

I Don’t Know Where It Is

Ms. James made it clear that Trump and the company were to provide statements regarding what they did to attempt finding these documents.  She went on to say Donald should have knowledge of the whereabouts of such documentation, since he, “personally executed documents central to the issues under investigation.”  If this is complied with, the civil contempt charge can potentially be averted. Well, how difficult is it to look in the paper shredder or the fireplace, Mr. Trump?  It could save you ten grand a day.  If you go too many days being fined this significant sum of money, how will Melania get her plastic surgery, or will you be able to afford golf balls, because those are the only kind you possess.  Ten big ones is a lot of McDonald’s, Donald.

Which Witch is Which?

Of course, forty-five’s lawyer is calling this, “a continuation of the greatest witch hunt of all time”; let her tell that line to Joan of Arc.  The Trump Organization alleges turning over more than 750,000 documents in this investigation, however the New York attorney general claims that the release of papers has been rather lethargic.  She wants a look at “post it notes” and the files that “The Donald” utilized as communication to his employee base.  This information is necessary to examine and evaluate whether civil suit will be brought against the former ‘Oval Office’ occupant and his firm.

Still Subject to The Rule of Law

Trump’s attorneys have filed an appeal and we don’t know whether the court of appeals will suspend the fine during the appellate process.  But reportedly the judge has just recently rejected “The Donald’s” affidavit, which claims Trump does not have the documents that are being demanded by the Attorney General of New York.  In closing, I for one am overjoyed to see any legal action against forty-five because absolutely no one is above the law, whether it be criminal or civil.  Statutes govern all citizens, even former White House residents.