Women of a Certain Age-Old School Edition

By Darlene Mitchell January 18, 2026 January 18, 2026 Calamity Politics, Cate Rees-Hessel, Humor, Modern Life, Positive Vibes

Women of a Certain Age – “Old School” Edition

By Cate Rees-Hessel

If you ever pinched your cheeks or bit your lips in an effort to add a rosy glow to your face, you might be a woman of a certain age.
If you have ordered from Ronco…
If you ever owned or used a bedazzler…
If you ever blotted your lipstick on a tissue…
If Jean Nate is your go to fragrance…
If you ever used Youth Dew and call it simply Estee Lauder…
If you know that Youth Dew started as a bath oil…
If you think a Zoom do is not an online meeting. And who remembers the PBS show?
If you wear Odyssey by Avon…
If you wear Imari by Avon…
If you think 74 year old Pierce Brosnan is young and sexy…
If you are as old as the Pillsbury Doughboy…
If you used anything made by Bonne Bell cosmetics…
If you had a puka shell necklace…
If you ever wore double belts and stirrup pants…
If you ever wore a body suit with snaps…
If you wore Charlie perfume and know the color variations the fragrance came in…
If you ever pressed your long locks with a clothing Iron…
If you ever wore shoulder pads but were not a powder puff football player…
If you still wear Sweet Honesty fragrance by Avon…
If you ever made and used an egg white mask…
If you wash your face with Dove beauty bar for “soft dewy skin”…
If if you use honey as a face mask…
If you ever used Queen Helene Mint Julep mask…
If you were ever long and silky or short and sassy – my husband claims that I am still short and sassy…

Happy New Year, everyone – ladies, we definitely still have style…

Women of a Certain Age-Yet Again…

By Darlene Mitchell August 2, 2024 August 2, 2024 Cate Rees-Hessel, Genetics and Migration Routes, Humor, Useless Information

Women of a Certain Age – Yet Again…

Women of a Certain Age-Yet Again…

By Cate Rees-Hessel

If you had a latch hook shag rug in colors of orange, yellow, and chocolate brown, you might be a woman of a certain age…
If you had a macrame plant hanger and a bead curtain in your first apartment…
If you remember some of the shows on “When Radio Was” when they originally ran…
If you know exactly what “You’ll shoot your eye out” means…
If you ever sent or received a telegram…
If you read Dennis the Menace or Mary Worth comic strips in a print newspaper…
If you still read and enjoy a print newspaper…
If you wore puka shells…
If you used Short and Sassy shampoo and conditioner…
If you remember the advertisement that read, “The only important things you wear are your jeans and your hair”…
If you remember “Curlers in your hair, shame on you”…
If you own curlers that don’t heat up or plug in…
If your boyfriend had a Mustang muscle car…
If you know who “Marsha, Marsha, Marsha” is…
If you ever ate in a Pizza Hut with a salad bar…
If you recall when bell bottoms and platform shoes were in fashion…
If you ever bought a cup of coffee for a quarter, or even 50 cents…
If you remember “You deserve a break today” and “At McDonald’s, it’s clean” commercials…
If you ever got change back from a dollar at McDonald’s…
If you ever shopped at a five and dime store…
If you know what a five and dime store is…
If you ever ate at a Woolworth restaurant…
If you remember the original dollar stores…
If you paid six dollars for your first concert ticket…
If you ever wore gloves and a hat on a regular basis…
If you remember Woodstock the concert, not just the bird…
If you remember “It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want too…you’d cry too if it happened to you”…
If you still own leg warmers and a double skinny belt…
If you miss big hair, beehives and Aquanet…
If you long for Dippity Do and DEP…
If you ever used a hairspray called FREEZE…
If you owned a smocked tunic top to wear over jeans…
If you still wear Jean Nate body splash…
If you still wear Sweet Honesty perfume…
If you ever used Youth Dew bath oil…
If you still use Prell Shampoo…
If you love a good “Skybar”…
If you know what a “Skybar” is…
If you still bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan (of course, the bacon you bring home is still less than your male counterpart)…
If you saw an Alfred Hitchcock film in a theater…
If you remember theaters that had only one screen…
If you would give anything for a Tab on ice…
If you know what a Tab is…
If a flower behind your ear was an elegant touch…
If you know the lyrics to all the Carol King and Carol Bayer Sager songs…
If you remember original Orange Julius drinks and Dilly Bars…
If you know exactly what “One Adam Twelve” means…
If you support and respect the older gentleman that authored the Violence Against Women Act and gave us our first female VP…
If Dr. Jill Biden is your role model…
If you weathered the rain and the sun marching for Girls in Sports, reproductive freedom, and ERA…

You Might Just Be A Woman Of A Certain Age

By Darlene Mitchell July 22, 2023 July 23, 2023 Anna Hessel, Arts & Entertainment, Culture, Humor, Modern Life, Positive Vibes, Senior & Elderly Issues, Useless Information

You Might Just Be A Woman Of A Certain Age

You Might Just Be a Woman of a Certain Age

By Anna Hessel

If you have ever worn clip earrings, or even know what clip earrings are…you might be a woman of a certain age.

If your hairdo (or your boyfriend’s) was a party in the back and business in the front…

If you have ever done anything in a phone booth…

If you know what a phone booth is or what it has to do with Superman…

If you used Tickle deodorant…

If you have ever worn shoulder pads when not playing powder puff football…

If you have a landline, had a landline, or even know what a landline is…

If you had a Princess or Trimline phone…

If you ever used a phone book…

If you ever used a clothing iron or frozen orange juice cans to fix your hair…

If you ever drank Tab, or know what Tab is…

If you ever served a Swanson Pot Pie for dinner…

If you refer to Lean Cuisine or the like as a TV dinner…

If you ever wore sequin mesh boots from Desperately Seeking Susan…

If you saw Desperately Seeking Susan on opening weekend…

If you ever had a Bianca Blast or used a Maybelline Kissing Potion before a date…

If you even know what a Bianca Blast is…

If you got peanut butter in somebody’s chocolate, or vice versa…

if you remember Madge the manicurist…

If you know what a manicurist is…

If you ever had a glass or half-moon manicure…

If you used baby oil with iodine to get a tan…

If you ever smoked an Eve…

(please note, I am NOT advocating the iodine, baby oil, or the Eves!)

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June 2026

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“I’ve finished my 3 book Spider Series. If you’re into hot sex and heart pounding adventure please check it out. Available on Amazon. Thank you for your interest and support. D. S. Mitchell aka “Calamity” at Calamity News and Politics.
“There is nothing more inspiring than taking action against injustice.” D.S. Mitchell 2025
“If stupidity got us into this mess, why can’t it get us out of it.” Will Rogers
“If you can’t be a poet, be a poem.” David Carradine
“No god would want a child killed in his name.” D.S. Mitchell 2023
“Without music, life would be a mistake.” Friedrich Nietzsche
“Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.” ― George Burns
“A politician thinks of the next election – a statesman of the next generation.” – James Freeman Clarke
“I want to disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed.” Arthur Ashe
“Our task must be to free ourselves… by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and it’s beauty.” ― Albert Einstein
“So the America I loved still exists, if not in the White House or the Supreme Court or the Senate or the House of Representatives or the media. The America I love still exists at the front desks of our public libraries.” ― Kurt Vonnegut
“Let’s just remember that social security is not the government’s money, it belongs to the people who had it taken out of the checks involuntarily their entire working lives.” Mike Huckabee
“I have insecurities of course, but I don’t hang out with anyone who points them out to me.” ADELE
“The growth and development of people is the highest calling of leadership.” Christian Grey
“My favorite old car had no reverse gear. It taught me I could only go forward.” Flavia
“Education is the most powerful weapon which we can use to change the world.” Nelson Mandela
“Those who think they can control the mob are fools and are often the victims of their own incitement.” D.S. Mitchell 2021
“A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
“If now isn’t a good time for the truth I don’t see when we’ll get to it.” Nikki Giovanni
“Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is that you are stupid and make bad decisions.” Your mother
“Studying American politics has taught me several disgusting lessons, the first being, money buys friends in Congress. That alone should terrify the American public.” D. S. Mitchell 2021
“My art is my heart.” D. S. Mitchell 2015
“Love life and life will love you back. Love people and they will love you back.” Arthur Rubenstein
“Every lie is like stepping in a quicksand pit. Every lie as dangerous, as telling the truth.” D. S. Mitchell 2020
“Sometimes when challenged we find out we are capable of the unthinkable.” D. S. Mitchell 2022
“Surround yourself with those on the same mission as you.” Anonymous
“Dimming the lights will not hide the social injustice in America.” D. S. Mitchell 2017
“The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. So I elect for neither label.” – James Branch Cabell
Smile
"If puppies and kittens don't make you smile, you might consider therapy." D. S. Mitchell 2015.
“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” Winston Churchill
“Every moment is a fresh beginning.” T. S. Eliot
“Voting is like a prayer.” Raphael Warnock 2021
“We are all valuable. The problem is not everyone is smart enough to realize it.” D. S. Mitchell 2021
“I wonder, if you were blind, lost and confused, would you care what color the offered hand?” D. S. Mitchell 2015
“Silence in front of savagery is savagery itself.” Abhijit Naskar
“To be happy and contented, count your blessings, not your cash.” Chinese Proverb
“We can never be too busy to be kind.” D. S. Mitchell 2017
RIP RBG
“The rain falls because the cloud can no longer handle the weight. The tears fall because the heart can no longer handle the pain.” The Wise You
“Let my old days be my best days,” Cousin Lucille
“In no instance have… the churches been guardians of the liberties of the people.” James Madison
“Happiness is a gift and the trick is not to expect it, but to delight in it when it comes.” Charles Dickens
“Thoughtful people are slow to anger, not necessarily less efficient in their killing.” D. S. Mitchell 2019
“Endings are not always bad. Most times they’re just beginnings in disguise.” Kim Harrison
“The United States like so many countries around the world has chosen to give to the few and deny the many.” D.S. Mitchell 2020
“It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. This is true, its called life.” Terry Pratchett
“Trickle down economics is like having three dogs and giving one of them a hot dog, and thinking he’ll share.” Bill Maher
“The modern conservative is engaged in one of man’s oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.” John Kenneth Galbraith
“When people start acting as though the past is the same as the present and context doesn’t matter, things start to get dangerous.” Trevor K. McNeil 2020
“Pardoning the Bad, is injuring the Good.” – Benjamin Franklin
“I don’t need to attend every argument I’m invited to.” Unknown
“I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret between the shadow and soul.” Pablo Neruda
“Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.” ― Bruce Lee
“I have been far oftener discriminated against because I am a woman than because I am black.” Shirley Chisholm 5/21/1969
“The turning points of lives are not the great moments. The real crises are often concealed in occurrences so trivial in appearance that they pass unobserved.” ― George Washington
“We only fail when we fail to try.” Rosa Parks
“The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much it is whether we provide enough for those who have little.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
“I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.” Thomas Jefferson
“The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything.” Albert Einstein
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
“The 7 Social Sins are: Wealth without Work; Pleasure without Conscience; Knowledge without Character; Commerce without Morality; Science without Humanity; Worship without Sacrifice; Politics without Principle.” Frederick Lewis Donaldson
“All evils are equal when they are extreme.”-Pierre Corneille
“Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future.” John F. Kennedy
“There is a cult of ignorance in the United States, and there always has been. The strain of anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.” Isaac Asimov
“People without vaginas shouldn’t be able to regulate them.” Unknown
“What this country needs is more unemployed politicians.” Edward Langley, artist
“Be sure to put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.” Abraham Lincoln
“When sleeping women wake, mountains move.” Chinese proverb
“If people stopped searching for things that offended them and started looking for things that inspired them; what a wonderful world this would be.” Night Owl
A Poem For Don and Vlad
A Poem For Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin
“If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” Booker T. Washington
“To argue with a person who has given up reason is like administering medicine to the dead.” Thomas Paine
“Imagination is the bridge between the things we know for sure, and the things we need to believe, when our world becomes unbearable.” Staceyann Chin
“The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.” Steve Jobs
“Inspiration descends only in flashes to clothe circumstances; it is not stored up in a barrel, like salt herrings to be doled out.”Patrick White
“I will not allow my life’s light to be determined by the darkness that surrounds me.” Sojourner Truth
“Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.” Doug Larson
“Law without humanity is injustice.” D. S. Mitchell 2020
“Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear, is the beginning of wisdom.” Bertrand Russell
“One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.” Plato
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Women of a Certain Age – “Old School” Edition

Women of a Certain Age – “Old School” Edition

Women of a Certain Age – Yet Again…

Women of a Certain Age-Yet Again…

You Might Just Be A Woman Of A Certain Age

You Might Just Be a Woman of a Certain Age

Pages

The Spider Series Commercial

“I’ve finished my 3 book Spider Series. If you’re into hot sex and heart pounding adventure please check it out. Available on Amazon. Thank you for your interest and support. D. S. Mitchell aka “Calamity” at Calamity News and Politics.

“There is nothing more inspiring than taking action against injustice.” D.S. Mitchell 2025

“If stupidity got us into this mess, why can’t it get us out of it.” Will Rogers

“If you can’t be a poet, be a poem.” David Carradine

“No god would want a child killed in his name.” D.S. Mitchell 2023

“Without music, life would be a mistake.” Friedrich Nietzsche

“Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.” ― George Burns

“A politician thinks of the next election – a statesman of the next generation.” – James Freeman Clarke

“I want to disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed.” Arthur Ashe

“Our task must be to free ourselves… by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and it’s beauty.” ― Albert Einstein

“So the America I loved still exists, if not in the White House or the Supreme Court or the Senate or the House of Representatives or the media. The America I love still exists at the front desks of our public libraries.” ― Kurt Vonnegut

“Let’s just remember that social security is not the government’s money, it belongs to the people who had it taken out of the checks involuntarily their entire working lives.” Mike Huckabee

“I have insecurities of course, but I don’t hang out with anyone who points them out to me.” ADELE

“The growth and development of people is the highest calling of leadership.” Christian Grey

“My favorite old car had no reverse gear. It taught me I could only go forward.” Flavia

“Education is the most powerful weapon which we can use to change the world.” Nelson Mandela

“Those who think they can control the mob are fools and are often the victims of their own incitement.” D.S. Mitchell 2021

“A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

“If now isn’t a good time for the truth I don’t see when we’ll get to it.” Nikki Giovanni

“Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is that you are stupid and make bad decisions.” Your mother

“Studying American politics has taught me several disgusting lessons, the first being, money buys friends in Congress. That alone should terrify the American public.” D. S. Mitchell 2021

“My art is my heart.” D. S. Mitchell 2015

“Love life and life will love you back. Love people and they will love you back.” Arthur Rubenstein

“Every lie is like stepping in a quicksand pit. Every lie as dangerous, as telling the truth.” D. S. Mitchell 2020

“Sometimes when challenged we find out we are capable of the unthinkable.” D. S. Mitchell 2022

“Surround yourself with those on the same mission as you.” Anonymous

“Dimming the lights will not hide the social injustice in America.” D. S. Mitchell 2017

“The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. So I elect for neither label.” – James Branch Cabell

Smile

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” Winston Churchill

“Every moment is a fresh beginning.” T. S. Eliot

“Voting is like a prayer.” Raphael Warnock 2021

“We are all valuable. The problem is not everyone is smart enough to realize it.” D. S. Mitchell 2021

“I wonder, if you were blind, lost and confused, would you care what color the offered hand?” D. S. Mitchell 2015

“Silence in front of savagery is savagery itself.” Abhijit Naskar

“To be happy and contented, count your blessings, not your cash.” Chinese Proverb

“We can never be too busy to be kind.” D. S. Mitchell 2017

RIP RBG

“The rain falls because the cloud can no longer handle the weight. The tears fall because the heart can no longer handle the pain.” The Wise You

“Let my old days be my best days,” Cousin Lucille

“In no instance have… the churches been guardians of the liberties of the people.” James Madison

“Happiness is a gift and the trick is not to expect it, but to delight in it when it comes.” Charles Dickens

“Thoughtful people are slow to anger, not necessarily less efficient in their killing.” D. S. Mitchell 2019

“Endings are not always bad. Most times they’re just beginnings in disguise.” Kim Harrison

“The United States like so many countries around the world has chosen to give to the few and deny the many.” D.S. Mitchell 2020

“It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. This is true, its called life.” Terry Pratchett

“Trickle down economics is like having three dogs and giving one of them a hot dog, and thinking he’ll share.” Bill Maher

“The modern conservative is engaged in one of man’s oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.” John Kenneth Galbraith

“When people start acting as though the past is the same as the present and context doesn’t matter, things start to get dangerous.” Trevor K. McNeil 2020

“Pardoning the Bad, is injuring the Good.” – Benjamin Franklin

“I don’t need to attend every argument I’m invited to.” Unknown

“I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret between the shadow and soul.” Pablo Neruda

“Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.” ― Bruce Lee

“I have been far oftener discriminated against because I am a woman than because I am black.” Shirley Chisholm 5/21/1969

“The turning points of lives are not the great moments. The real crises are often concealed in occurrences so trivial in appearance that they pass unobserved.” ― George Washington

“We only fail when we fail to try.” Rosa Parks

“The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much it is whether we provide enough for those who have little.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

“I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.” Thomas Jefferson

“The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything.” Albert Einstein

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, Jr.

“The 7 Social Sins are: Wealth without Work; Pleasure without Conscience; Knowledge without Character; Commerce without Morality; Science without Humanity; Worship without Sacrifice; Politics without Principle.” Frederick Lewis Donaldson

“All evils are equal when they are extreme.”-Pierre Corneille

“Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future.” John F. Kennedy

“People without vaginas shouldn’t be able to regulate them.” Unknown

“What this country needs is more unemployed politicians.” Edward Langley, artist

“Be sure to put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.” Abraham Lincoln

“When sleeping women wake, mountains move.” Chinese proverb

“If people stopped searching for things that offended them and started looking for things that inspired them; what a wonderful world this would be.” Night Owl

A Poem For Don and Vlad

“If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” Booker T. Washington

“To argue with a person who has given up reason is like administering medicine to the dead.” Thomas Paine

“Imagination is the bridge between the things we know for sure, and the things we need to believe, when our world becomes unbearable.” Staceyann Chin